I wrote a blog sometime in the past year called, When She Was Ours, which was a post about a little girl named Madison that my family lost 10 years ago in what we thought was an adoption process. She left us at apprx. 3 1/2 years old after living with our family for a year. Obviously, it was heartache for us all losing her.
I’ve told my mom through the years that I will always be trying to find her again, just so she will be aware, and also because I wanted to know up front if she wanted to know if I found her.
For 10 years I’ve looked for her. She is 13 now and I’ve thought, with Facebook, I’ve got to be able to find a 13 year old girl! Even went old school and tried Myspace but I’ve never found her.
Now most people can’t relate to trying to finding someone but when you are, you look for any name or link that can lead you in a new search. All I’ve ever known is mom’s first and married last name, Madison’s first and last name, and her brother’s name. Sounds pretty good until you’ve exhausted those options and you are back at square one.
About 3 weeks ago, my mom and I were talking about Madison and she brought down a picture of her that one of her grandmother’s had sent us in the 6 months after we lost her. On the back was a new name and I told my mom that I was going to try to find granny on Facebook =0)
No luck…at least I don’t think. It pulled names but I know nothing about her so who knows who I was looking at. But this time, I tried again to search her biological mom’s name aka who got her back when she left us and this time, I pulled a name and in parenthesis to her first and last name was Madison’s last name!!!! Praise the Lord people include other last names in aiding people to find them on Facebook. I went out on a limb and sent her a message that went a little like this:
“Hey! Not sure if I have the right person but I was wondering if you are (name deleted), Madison’s mom. We (my mom and step-dad) fostered Madison around 2000ish and I was 18 at the time. My mom is (name deleted). I’m 29 now and a mother to one daughter with one on the way. I always wonder how she is and what’s she’s like. If this is you, I would love an update. If it’s the wrong person, sorry for the confusion =0) Thanks so much!” Rebecca
AND THREE HOURS LATER she wrote me back and I found her! After 10 years of looking, I found Madison! Technically I found her mom but it was finding her, too. She sent me pictures of her that’s she’s taken through the years and recent ones. I even got 2 videos of her singing at church. It was crazy awesome! I can’t explain what it’s like to lose a child in your life and have them reemerge as a teenager and get to hear them speak. I loved to hear her speak.
I always wondered if I would recognize her in a room full of strangers and now I know I would. Her mother was so open and so sweet to share everything with me. I know how tall she is, what she likes, where she’s lived all these years, what her life has been like, and the million dollar question: Does she remember us? And she does =0) She was so young, this is all thanks to her mother who showed her the scrapbooks we sent her with. So, Madison knows us through stories and pictures. That’s worth it’s weight in gold to me.
And to top it off with a grand finale, she will be in my hometown this summer and I get to see her!!!! Madison was already told that her mother and I have been talking and she is excited to meet me. HOLD UP! PARTY IN MY IMAGINATION!
I just can’t believe it.
I told her mom that even though we loved Madison, I respect that I’m a stranger to her and that she doesn’t know me. I told her I expect nothing from her and that I’m a teenager whisperer and that it will be laid back and natural for her, I promise!
Meeting was her mom’s idea! I’m just so excited. If I’m able to, I hope to post pictures of our little reunion. I think most blog update posts are lame but I had to share this. Please read When She Was Ours which talks about losing her so you will know what this really means to me. It’s a good, non-lame post. Promise =0)